Dearest Bertha, The Larger,
You will be sorely missed. Your death at 10:30PM on October 17th was sad, although not unexpected. Once in your life, your soared through Word, Powerpoint, and even the internets. You could burn a DVD like it was your business. You even replaced Mr.TV this year.
Yet Bertha, you were a big girl. Lugging you from Britain and back so many times permanantly hurt my back. I even remember when I first got you and thought that your weight was nothing. The need for typing in libraries quickly proved that wrong. Your weighed dragged you down, girl. And I think that (the coroner will agree) is what killed you in the end.
Yet I still love you and the memories we have formed. Stripping you of your keyboard, memory, DVD burner, wireless card, and fans was a low day in my life, but now you can live on through Susie Q, making her a faster machine.
Bertha was survived by her replacements, Susie Q (the smaller, thinner Dell) and Skippy (the Tablet HP). She will be missed